Friday, April 26, 2013

Cancer: Round Two


This is how things change.

On Tuesday, April 9 we celebrate DH's (darling husband's) birthday with an extravagant dinner with friends at our favorite restaurant. We make happy noises about the food and pass around bites so rich it is absurd to even contemplate their arterial impact. We simply go with the moment and taste everything.

The next day I'm at MD Anderson for my yearly visit to the survivorship clinic. This will mark - let's celebrate anyway - my 15th cancer-free year.  The mammogram shows an anomaly.  We take another view. The second shot is inconclusive.  My nurse practitioner meets me in the exam room and says, "I don't want to alarm you, but we need to get another an ultrasound to make sure it's benign."

I'm not alarmed. Lobular breast cancer, which affects approximately 10 percent of all breast cancer cases, does not image well.  Never has, never will.  It's sneaky. The cells line up in a single file instead of clustering to form a mass.

But by the time I'm in ultrasound, where a radiologist in heavily accented English says, "Do not talk when I have needle in your neck," I realize, this is how your life changes.  I see the oblong node above my collar bone, a plump little dude, and the needle moving up and down within it.  For a moment something pierces. "So sorry," the doctor says, "I didn't put novocaine in the muscle."

I know.

The ultrasound room is so dark and quiet it has become its own universe, sealed off from regular life. Yet I know that behind the door is a small waiting room where four or five women in bathrobes are waiting. They read old magazines, legs crossed, feet jiggling and twitching. Those gestures mark time. They are waiting while I'm lying still, insanely comfortable on a new gurney (brand new, $4,000 worth of new, the wonderful ultrasound tech informed me) and bundled up in heated blankets. Then I realize a third person is in the room; the pathology assistant for the second, then third biopsy. The tissue will be analyzed immediately. I will know what I need to know what I already know from seeing the enlarged lymph node on the screen. Between biopsies I actually fell asleep. Right now that is my operating definition of mercy, to understand that another diagnosis of cancer is imminent and to be all right with that knowledge.

With cancer it's not one simple moment but a series of steps, one leading to the next. By the time I arrive home, when DH asks how my visit went, I have to tell him, "not well." He is a three-time melanoma survivor. "Not well" tells him something he never wanted to hear.

*  *  *

Since April 10 I have been largely offline,  either at MD Anderson or trying to get the next appointment in place, and talking with gracious physicians who have been generous with their time, explanations and kindness.  

Plus after 15 years NED I now enter the changed world of cancer diagnostics.  I am no longer a CT or MRI virgin. I drank the fruit-flavored barium smoothie, I've had the contrast IV's.  I ran into the inevitable young phlebotomist who missed a vein the size of a worm; I looked at her pleasantly and said, "go get someone else." 

The scans showed a different, but not rare, metastatic trail. There is nothing in the lungs or liver; but lymph node involvement and small nodules in the peritoneum and along a lymph chain that travels behind the diaphragm. There are positive nodes in the left axilla and neck, which were discovered by ultrasound. There is NO second primary cancer. All of this stems from the first cancer, so neither surgery nor radiation are needed at this point.

Biologically? The cancer's make-up is the same: 100 percent estrogen positive, progesterone negative, HER 2-neu negative. It's time to take away this cancer's food source. I'm about to be so thoroughly estrogen deprived that what I used to complain about menopause will soon become "the good old days." There are many options for shrinking this cancer and I have every hope that this will happen. The fact that it has been 15 years since my original diagnosis helps considerably. 

Last night I started treatment via the local Kroger's, where I picked up a prescription for Femara (letrozole), an AI or aromotase inhibitor. Where tamoxifen blocks the estrogen receptors on cancerous cells themselves Letrozole blocks the enzyme that converts androgens into estrogen in postmenopausal women. In premenopausal women the ovaries are the primary estrogen source.  In two months we'll look at what the Femara has accomplished, then consider the double whammy of Aromosin (exemestane) and Affinitor (everomilus),  another AI combined with an oral chemotherapy agent. With both approaches I'll receive monthly injections of Xgeva (denosumab) to shore up my bone strength.  

This morning DH wonders if I've experienced any side effects.  "No," I told him, "all systems are go."

It has been difficult, and still is, to relate to this new information.  Yet my life is different.  How I prioritize will be different.  One thing is steadfast: my commitment to #BCSM and advocacy. This is as strong if not stronger than ever. So is my knowledge that I am not alone in living with metastatic breast cancer. When there are times of complete stillness, I know all of you will be with me.  That is how I feel about you.  And that we are all in this together, in this moment and those to come.


* * *

106 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dearest Jody - you have my never ending love and support. Sending massive but gentle hugs to you.

stales said...

Jody, We are with you every step of the way on this journey. Sending you lots of love.. and some cookies. You are an amazing woman and I know you'll have the whole community behind you. love, alicia xoxoxoxo

katie ford hall said...

Oh my god Jody. So much love to you.

Debbie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Suzzann Cummings said...

Jody, sending you hugs and strength every step of the way. Suzzann

AnneMarie said...

It's impossible to type when one is sobbing and trembling at the same time. I can only say I am here, beside you, sending all of my love and every ounce of support to you.

I Send LOVE...

xoxox

SciMom said...

Jody, your inner strength will get you through this next phase of your life. I send you all my support and best wishes. Irene

MightyCaseyMedia said...

With you. Love you. Armies of warriors girding up to support you in your fight.

Unknown said...

Jody, I am so sorry to hear this news. Your grace and strength which you share in these words is amazing, and I think you did not come by it easily. I admire you. How can Irene and I help? Oliver

Caroline said...

Crap. I'm sorry to hear this. But Femara does a pretty good job. I will say by the second cancer go round, the naivete is gone. We know a lot more. And there have been so many treatment advances in recent years as well. Big hugs and hang in there.

Unknown said...

This BCSM lurker sends you lots of love and support. It seems like a good time to step out of lurk mode and say how much you in particular (and BCSM in general) have helped me find strength in the past year. Much love from Connecticut

elizabeth said...

I should know what to say by now, but I’m just speechless. I’m so sorry you’re having to go through this – again.
Sending you love, prayers, good thoughts, whatever you need!

Diamat said...

It's news that none of us wanted to hear, but thank you for sharing it, nevertheless. This time, the #bcsm legion you helped build will be with you.

KOB said...

So sorry to hear this. Please let me know if there is any information I can share with you.

Take care

KOB

Matt Katz, MD said...

Dear Jody: Sorry to hear the news but you have my love and support. Let me know if there's anything I can do to support you.
- Matt

Anonymous said...

Oh, Jody. We have never met in person, but you have been a rock for me in my experience. I now offer you me--the rock--to be with you in yours. xoxoxoxo

*Erica* said...

Sending love and prayers. We all fight together. In sisterhood, no one is alone.

(((BIG hugs)))

Dr. Michael A. Wosnick said...

Ahh, Jody this is so hard to hear. If ever there was a time for a virtual {big hug} this is surely it. I'm sure your grace and elegance and grit and determination will get you through this as it has done before. You do so much for others, I hope we can return the favour in some way.

Michael

carmen2u said...

With you every step of the way, my dear fearless friend. As you know, BCSM is a reinforcement of support and whatever you need is a bat signal away. Love and hugs to you.

Carolyn C. said...

Wishing you all the strength and courage and love you need right now. You are awesome.

Unknown said...

Dear Jody, you welcomed me warmly to the #bcsm but I am a stranger to you. It sounds like they are starting you off on the same track as I started, I'm here, and so very sorry to hear your news. Many gentle hugs... xoxo

Nick Dawson said...

"Between biopsies I actually fell asleep. Right now that is my operating definition of mercy, to understand that another diagnosis of cancer is imminent and to be all right with that knowledge."

Isn't the body's reaction to stress amazing?

And I read something deeper there too - it's the peace and tranquility which comes from knowing you are an expert, you are surrounded by experts, you know what to expect, where to draw support, and that you have the strength to push through this.

I have to think your community leadership and advocacy has so much to do with being in that place of tranquillity. It also means you are well prepared for whatever may come. Those things give me comfort.

Know that we're all with you - all your friends, internet, local, or otherwise. We're all sending love and positive vibes.

Jim's Girl said...

I am so sorry to hear this news. So sorry you have joined this club. We are here for you. Fearless friends.

~Kate of Kate Has Cancer

MommaMc said...

This sucks! We send our unwavering support your way. Much love from your friends at LIVESTRONG.

Renn said...

I'm sitting here in a hotel room in Vegas, stunned. Simply stunned. I am so sorry you are dealing with this #$@% diagnosis. Again. Yet you write with such clarity. You are amazing! Sending airplane hangers full of {{{hugs}}}. We are here for you!!

itsthebunk said...

Dearest Jody, I love you. I am here for you. and that is all I can find to say as I continue to try and digest, not only your news, but the graceful, thoughtful, exquisite way in which you are sharing it, and what you are choosing to do with it. We have circled the #BCSM wagons around you. Love, Liza

Debbie said...

Ah Jody. I am so sad to read this. I hope it is okay for me to say that I am sad about this. I will have positive, uplifting words for you, I promise. But right now I am so damn mad about it all. My "I don't understand it" file is really beyond it's capacity now. I love you. Deb

Beth L. Gainer said...

Jody,

We've never met, but I do know you. I love you dearly and am sending you gentle cyberhugs. The BCSM community will be there through good and rough times alike.

xoxo
Beth

Tambre Leighn, MA, CPC, ELI-MP said...

While it was only a couple of days, I did get to sit with you long enough at the CTCA AZ Blogger Summit to get a sense that you know how to bring it and will as you take next steps. There is a sense of clarity and focus that comes through you post. You are courageous, inspiring and obviously part of a huge community that has your back. Thank you for sharing a deeply personal moment in a way that will make a difference for others, something you obviously value in life. We are here for you!

Brandie said...

Jody, I'm so sorry to read this news. I'm holding you in my heart and thinking of you.

Anonymous said...

Jody, It's rare that I am at a loss for words. You are the heart and soul of #BCSM and as you have been here for each of us, we are here now and always for you. Your grace and introspection in sharing this development is consistent with how you approach your advocacy which is nothing short of remarkable. Sending much love to you and those cowbells are about to get much louder. XO Abbey

Jackie Fox said...

Such a shock. I can hear gasps from around the country and around the world, including mine. I can feel tears, including mine. I wish you nothing but love, light, cowbell, poetry & pie. I wish evil effing cancer something else entirely. XOX

Terri Wingham said...

I Just heard the news via Twitter and immediately came to read this beautifully written post. There are so many things I could say, but I don't have the true words to express how sad I am that you are faced with this and how grateful I am for the grace with which you have brought us into the story. Thank you for your advocacy, your voice, and your steadfast will in creating community and connection through #BCSM. I am here in any capacity I can support you.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Jody. I will have all fingers and toes crossed for you in the weeks/months ahead. Sending you good strong wishes as warm as those heated blankets...

Practical Caregiver Guides said...

Jody, you're such a fine teacher. I've learned a lot from you in such a short time. Too bad you have to teach such a lowdown, good-for-nothing, rat-faced,^$#@*< subject. We're going to have to get you a professorship in a more viable field. Communications. Social media. Better still, Wise Women Who Have Much Still to Teach Us. We could fund a chair for you. But let's not make it at Cancer U. You deserve so much better than that.

Medical Lessons said...

Dear Jody,
What a lot to take in, and what to say? - except that you've got a real community of people who care, whom you've helped.

We're all affected by what's happening to you. I hope you're feeling well. Best wishes always,
Elaine

DarryleP said...

Jody you have always inspired and you continue to inspire. Sending hugs and love.

Susan Zager said...

Jody, I am in shock. I am with you every step of the way. There is so much going on for your mind all at once. Please know you have my full support for every moment as you embark on this incredible journey. I want you to know I send you my biggest virtual hugs and xoxoxo- Love, Susan

Unknown said...

Jody, I know we don't know each other, but as a lurker on BCSM I feel like I know you from afar. You are such an amazing woman, advocate and fearless friend to so many. You are not alone in this journey. I, along with the entire BCSM community, will be sending you lots of love!!! Big hugs to you.

Robert S. Miller, MD said...

Jody, I am so very sorry to hear this news. It is so terribly unfair to you that you have to deal with this. You have been an unbelievable pillar of strength to so many. Your advocacy, passion, and sincere interest in the welfare of the many whose lives you have touched have inspired me in my work. My thoughts are with you, and I join in the collective hugs. Our cyber-friendship borne over early morning and late night tweets and IRL bonding a couple of years ago in Palo Alto mean very much to me. Please, please, please don't hesitate to let me know if I can offer any specific professional help or support in general. --Bob Miller

Jamie said...

Jody

I hope this doesn't offend you. My fury sputters! I effing HATE this disease.
In the Middle East they have wailers. If you need someone to curse and yell for you, call me!
I love you.
Jamie
@ibeatcancertwice

Elaine Schattner, M.D. said...

Dear Jody,
What a lot to take in -
What can I say? Except that you've got a real community of people who care, whom you've helped. We're all affected by what's happening to you.

I hope you're feeling well. With best wishes always,
Elaine

Vicki said...

I can't imagine what you're feeling right now, but please know that I'm thinking about you. You are a continuing inspiration to all of us. Love you, Vicki

The Accidental Amazon said...

Oh, Jody...when I read your status update earlier, I was reading it on my phone, having just left a patient who'd had breast cancer twice herself. On my phone, I could only see that your cancer had returned, but not to what extent. Just reading that it had come back at all was enough to stop me cold. I had to sit & cry before I drove to my next patient. Now, I'm reading this.

I echo everyone's love & thoughts. You could not have assembled a better group of friends, experts, and supporters. But I have to say, while I feel privileged to be your friend, I never wanted to have to be your #fearlessfriend, too. But you know I am. Always.

Sending you & Steve gentle, heartfelt hugs.
Kathi

Lani Horn said...

Jody. I have had to take some time to absorb this news. You are such an important mentor, friend, fellow advocate, role model, and awesome human being.

I know you will use your kick ass intellect to navigate the road ahead with your usual wit, grace, and love.

AND COWBELL. AND PIE.

XOXOXO

Cancerfree2b said...

Dearest Jody,
I am so sorry to hear this news. I can't believe it. I am speechless along with so many others. Tears. Love. Prayers. LOVE. Love, love, love to you. I am here for you, with you, to support you in any way I can. Remember, you are fierce like that Tigress in the photo. Much love to you always, my friend.
XOXOXOXOXOX
Lisa

Susan Zager said...

Oh Jody. I got this news as I was getting ready to board a flight. All of my info is jumbled and I want you to know that I am sending you so much love and support. This news is just so shocking. I know that all of this estrogen blocking can be uncomfortable yet I am hoping it works at keeping this at bay for a very long time. You are such an incredible spirit and you have so much support. As a part of the #BCSM community and personally I just want you to know how much my thoughts and prayers are with you as you embark on this new journey. This disease is so cruel. I am here for you in any way that I can be for you. I am sending you so much love and support. XoXoXo, Love and Hugs - Susan Zager

DebHorwitz said...

Jody, I have a heavy heart reading this today. I hang in the background a lot on Twitter b/c I sometimes get anxious & overwhelmed with cancer talk. I am however SO grateful to be a part of BCSM and I have learned so much from the group. You will be in my thoughts and you are such a tireless advocate that I believe you when you say that this will only make you work harder.
Thank you for all you do for us and I hope you feel us cheering you on.
Sending love.

Debbie

Felicia said...

Well, damn. I mean - just. DAMN! Not happy to hear this news today, Jody, but I hope you know your sisters will be holding your hand every step of the way.

AfternoonNapper said...

Sometimes all we can say to ourself is, "Okay, so this is what we do now." We seems such an applicable pronoun because there's more than one entity inside our body—head, heart, soul, body, disease. Being old pros provides a pragmatic sense of acceptance. We know the motions. We know the science. From that we are, in one way, better prepared; however, knowing what to expect also can be exactly what scares us most. Your diagnosis is not fair; no disease ever is. It sucks. It sucks, and it's stupid, and it's f'<king bull$h*t to have to go through this again...but differently.

I'm not part of the #bcsm crew, but I am someone who has learned from all that you have done and who continually is impressed by your grit. Know that I am thinking of you, and that I mean it when I say, if there's anything I can do, let me know.

Diane said...

Jesus, Jody, I am so sorry. And I am so furious that this has happened to you. Sending you lots of love and hugs. As for the mets, I've got my boxing gloves on and am punching the living crap out of it (in my mind, anyway). Hang tough, my friend. Glad you've got your battle plan in place. XOXOXOXXO.

Sean Ahrens said...

Sending much love your way Jody! I want you take this one down. Much love.

Anonymous said...

Terrible news. Sending hugs and love. Marilyn

Unknown said...

Jody, here's a tight virtual hug for you.

Melanoma Mama said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Melanoma Mama said...

Jody, I am so very sorry to hear this. Sending you positive thoughts, support, and strength ... and lots of hugs. Donna (melanoma_mama)

Unknown said...

Jody...I am so sorry to hear your news. Your eloquent words continue to inspire and teach us all how to live with humor, courage and spunk as we meet with adversity. You have an incredible support system built and ready to hold you and support you each step along this journey of hope and healing.
Hugs,
Pam
@pamressler

kntspl said...

Dear Jody,

So many folks have used the word Grace when they describe you. This is a word you have earned. Your transparency is remarkable and I respect you so much. I wish i was an elegant writer and could find the perfect words but I'm not.

I promise I will keep you in the Light~You are important to me.

Anonymous said...

Dear Jody,
I just heard via a twitter thread and read your post. Sending you hugs and positive vibes,
Ruth Ann

Deb Boyce said...

Dear Dear Jody,

I am truly at a loss for words. No words can capture the emotions and soul surges I've been feeling since I read your news a couple of hours ago.

Insidious cells....

What I can say is letrozole is an all-star aromatase inhibitor. I took it for 3 years as part of a clinical trial and am in year three of the 5-year double-blind follow-up trial.

If you'd like to talk, I'm here for you, along with the multitude of beloved #bcsm followers.

I am sending healing energies and prayers your way, to buoy your spirit and lift your soul.

Hugs :-}

Deb





Rann said...

Hi Jody,
Sorry to hear your news. Your post was beautiful, I learned a lot and realize what a truly courageous person you must be. I felt peaceful resolve in your words, and was strengthened by them. I love your grace and bulldog tenacity.

I hope you find strength in all of the loving comments. You are no doubt surrounded by many friends.

Sending much love and prayers your way.
~Rann

LeeAase said...

Jody - I am so sorry to hear this and will keep you in my prayers.

BreastCancerSisterhood.com said...

Dear Friend,
I just learning of your heartbreaking news, and I am devastated for you, for all of us. Something's not right in the same areas of my body, so I've stopped packing boxes for my move to NYC to await my own test results. I send my love and prayers.
Brenda

Unknown said...

Jody:

It seems just days ago that we met in Arizona and your news has me stunned and saddened. I'm sending all my love and support to you and your family. We're all here for you.

Debbie

Unknown said...

Jody - we are all on your team and know that you will do well! Everyone at LIVESTRONG is thinking of you!

Best,
Doug

westr said...

God be with you, Jodi! Thank you for sharing this with us all. You are in my prayers.

-Bob

Jan said...

Oh, Jody! I am so late to this conversation. And am so sorry. You now join me in the increasing ranks of the metastatic. I find that I live each day through my hope and faith. I'm glad this won't change your advocacy efforts. You are in my prayers, dear one. Much love. xoxo

tccomments2013 said...

dear jody,

you are loved and admired by so many. the collective feelings of affection, empathy, and being held close to so many good hearts - i hope you FEEL it all! thinking of you and your family, sending powerful vibes for healing and strength -

love, XOXO

karen, TC

Anonymous said...

Jody, so sorry to hear this news. Know that you have a huge army of friends around the world thinking of you and sending you all the strength and love in the world to get through this. Much love and best wishes, Laura xx

Facing Cancer Together said...

I'm so sorry to hear the news, Jody. It was such a shock to read it on Marie's weekly round-up. I'm wishing you sooo much support, and really great results too. You have been such an inspiration. BCSM is an anchor for so many. ~Catherine

Unknown said...

Dear, dear Jody, I am so sorry to hear the news.
In the last weeks, when I was waiting for my MRI & PET CT results, and been wondering what would it be like, if the results turned positive for cancer and negative for me, I thought that if there will be a 2nd round it will be different especially according to two major things.
No more fearing the nightmare of this secret initials and codes, that must be saying some awful things about my health, that I don't understand or remember...
To the 2nd round, I was thinking, and it is even brighter when concerning you, you arrive with much more knowledge, experience and information, not even mentioning, (BTW our #bcsm chat on why becoming an advocate...), the army of smart, deep and serious women, whom will be pointing you to any information you might need. This time, you are not alone.
This time you can be sure, that you will be better treated, because we've learned how to be better patients (to ourselves), and because MD'd are more aware of our real needs and concerns, with many thanks to you and the others, who keep changing the world of women with cancer.
I wish you a successful and effective treatment, with as little side effects as possible.
Big hugs.
Efrat

Unknown said...

Dear, dear Jody, I am so sorry to hear the news.
In the last weeks, when I was waiting for my MRI & PET CT results, and been wondering what would it be like, if the results turned positive for cancer and negative for me, I thought that if there will be a 2nd round it will be different especially according to two major things.
No more fearing the nightmare of this secret initials and codes, that must be saying some awful things about my health, that I don't understand or remember...
To the 2nd round, I was thinking, and it is even brighter when concerning you, you arrive with much more knowledge, experience and information, not even mentioning, (BTW our #bcsm chat on why becoming an advocate...), the army of smart, deep and serious women, whom will be pointing you to any information you might need. This time, you are not alone.
This time you can be sure, that you will be better treated, because we've learned how to be better patients (to ourselves), and because MD'd are more aware of our real needs and concerns, with many thanks to you and the others, who keep changing the world of women with cancer.
I wish you a successful and effective treatment, with as little side effects as possible.
Big hugs.
Efrat

The Savvy Sister said...

Damn Jody. Your courage and ability to convey what you're going through to us while in the middle of it all is truly awe inspiring.

I am sending strength love and peace to you and your family

Nancy's Point said...

I still have no idea what to say here. I can't seem to absorb this news. I'm sorry. I care. I'm here. Guess I'll go with that. Much, much love to you, my friend.

Sarah and Erwin said...

Dear Jody,
Brooke at LIVESTRONG Foundation alerted staff to this difficult news you've shared. Please know that we are all rooting for you.
Sarah Arvey

Anonymous said...

Dearest Jody,

Live and thrive.

Greg

Unknown said...

I am holding you and your family in the light, Jody.

Barbara Musser said...

Dear Jody, I just learned about this tonight on the #BCSM chat. We've only met virtually and that is enough for now. Count me as part of your ever-growing support circle. The way your news has catalyzed #BCSM is inspiring and beautiful. If there's anything special that I can offer, please know that I will...
Much love, Barbara Musser xxoo

Barbara Musser said...

Dear Jody, I've just learned tonight about your news, on the #BCSM chat. This takes my breath away, and your clarity and courage are so obvious. Count me in as part of your every-growing support circle. If there's anything special I can offer you, I will. Just ask.
Much love, Barbara Musser

Wendy said...

Jody,
Your grace is amazing and admirable. I'm thinking of you!

Sally G said...

Thank you for sharing this and for all the posts. As a relatively "new" breast cancer patient, I have gathered much strength from the sisterhood around the world. Lots of love and hugs to you Jody as you face this latest challenge, from Durban, South Africa. xx

Paul Blais said...

Jody,
I am so sorry to hear of your newest struggle with cancer. I hate it. I have recently been dragged to the battlefield myself (http://paulblais.blogspot.com/2013/02/the-next-thing.html). After two surgeries the doc thought all was good. Then he found more cancer this past thursday and my head and heart are spinning. (http://paulblais.blogspot.com/2013/04/sunny-and-dark.html). This is a scary path.
I feel for you and your husband.
Love from a stranger,
Paul Blais

Unknown said...

I read our full blog and it's really sad I wish you all the best for future.
Emergency Room Houston

Anonymous said...

I'm late to the conversation, Jody, but my heart is with you and I hope you can feel the good thoughts speeding down I-45 (or the Hardy Toll Road)from my 'burb to yours. We are indeed with you, my friend. xo

Anonymous said...

Dear Jody,
I am so so so sorry to learn of this news. Sending love, prayers and (((((((((hugs))))))))) your way. Kathleen

e-Patient Dave said...

I just got the news, via the e-patients.net post. I'm beyond shocked; I barely know you yet I know you and I'm in sad angry tears here in my office.

Powerfully written. God, this should be an essay in Time or something.

We're with you.

Unknown said...

Jody,
We are here..just as you have been for us.

Marcia

Anonymous said...

I have been staring at this blank "Leave you comment" box for far too long. How, Jody, did you find the poise, the humour and the strength to write the most powerful blog post ever? You managed to take the fury out of the stormiest of seas, finding calm to get the boat safely to shore - at least to the first shore of a journey that will froth the seas many more times I'm sure.

Oddly enough it is the "Captcha" words that helped me write my comment. The first word eenKFta written in curvy italics conjures up an expletive that I'd like to shout until my voice is raw, followed by "compass" in square and stately Times Roman denotes the direction and guidance that your journey will give to millions who follow you.

I too add my love and will be with you virtually every step of the way.
Colleen

Cate Conroy said...

Sad to hear the news. Praying that you'll find the strength in mind, body and spirit as you move forward with treatment.

AmyK said...

Love is what I feel for you and what I send to you, love is what will kick this cancer's butt a second time! Love, Amy Kiel

MJ said...

Much love to you Jody. Send healing thoughts and energy.

Tami said...

Jody, I'm just now reading your beautiful, eloquent post. I am so sorry that you are now among the growing ranks of metastatic survivors! I know you have a fabulous support system and a fountain of knowledge and connections to get you through. So glad that you are continuing your work with renewed passion.

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jeremy said...

Being strong is a big factor. Can be part of your healing.

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Administrador said...

good luck to those brave women
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Unknown said...

Prayers that keep us Strong. With all support and hugs.

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Tracy said...

Jody I am a month old lurker from the twitter feed. A strong group of folks I am so pleased to be following. You are an amazing person. Please know you are on my list calling out to wish you great vibes, and calm days.

Tracy said...

Jody I am a month old lurker from the twitter feed. A strong group of folks I am so pleased to be following. You are an amazing person. Please know you are on my list calling out to wish you great vibes, and calm days.

Servivorgirl said...

Be well, may you heal well and soon.

Julie Goodale said...

With all the traveling I've been doing, I missed this until just now. I am so very sorry to read this! You know you have all my good thoughts (and lots of other folks' too). May you continue to find all the strength & peace you need. And we're all here to help in any way we can.
- So very glad to see that you are on the bike today!!!

Mariam said...

I am Mariam used every single spell worker on the internet, spent untold amounts of money and discovered they are all fakes...i was the fool though; doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. In the end, I decided that I wanted a tarot reading to know what my future held for me; I contacted a woman who lives locally to me and she told me about a man named (Priests Abija); he does not advertise on the internet, has another job for income, has no set prices, makes no false promises and refuses to help anyone that cannot be helped and even helps for free sometimes, he will give you proof before taking money. He is a wonderful man and he was the only person who actually gave me real results. I really hope he doesn't mind me advertising his contact on the internet but I'm sure any help/ extra work will benefit him.contact him here as +447053820826 or spirituallighthealing101@live.com He travel sometimes.i cant give out his number cos he told me he don’t want to be disturbed by many people across the world..he said his email is okay and he’ will replied to any emails asap,love marriage,finance, job promotion ,lottery Voodoo,poker voodoo,golf Voodoo,Law & Court case Spells,money voodoo,weigh loss voodoo,any sicknesses voodoo,Trouble in marriage,HIV AIDS,it's all he does Hope this helps everyone that is in a desperate situation as I once was; I know how it feels to hold onto something and never have a chance to move on because of the false promises and then to feel trapped in wanting something
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Cancer Free Women said...

Live and keep on keepin on.

Beckye said...

Dear Jodie, you have been an inspiration and support for all of us since any of us met you in person or online. None of us have forgotten you or what you are going through. I am praying for you and would love to hear an update. May you be aware of the Lord's presence, peace, and grace as you walk this path with Him. He loves you dearly. We all love you, too.

Healthopinion said...

Cancer is one of the risky illness.But can be treatable if its signs foung in its beginning.Thank you for providing this details.
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Texas is our Home on the Range said...

Hoping your treatment is starving that cancer.

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